If it weren't Friday, I would go crazy.

I don't know why I load myself down...I don't know why I just can't say NO. I love being creative especially when its something for my family. I know the the gifts and talents that Heavenly Father gives us are meant to be used and shared and improved, but its so hard for me to keep a good attitude during the "sharing" part. I started a tutu business but found that I enjoy creating fun things for my girls more than other people :( I'm such a stinkin perfectionist that I end up putting so much time and effort into something that its hardly worth the price I ask. Tutus are a different story and actually not that bad...its the cakes. THE CAKES. I have never taken and sort of culinary classes or training. Everything I've learned about cooking and baking I've gotten from my mom. You want things to taste great BUT also look good too. Presentation is what sells it first. I made a birthday cake for Evan the first year that we were married and decorated it with all kinds of cool things. It turned out great! I didn't really have a lot of cake decorating supplies so for the next few years we made more adult types of cakes like heath bar cake and lemon meringue pie (Evans favorites) We had Takara and I felt a lot of pressure in making her first birthday cake, I wanted it to be perfect but didn't know enough about cakes or have the tools to do it. So I kept it simple. Then when we had Kimi I figured there were going to be plenty of birthdays to work on trial and error, and this is the perfect time since they were too little to critique my work. It all started last July 2010. I had a wilton book that I wanted to make so many cakes out of but was too scared. I finally decided to just do it. How did it look? GREAT! How did it hold up? not so great. I knew nothing about stacking cakes but I read somewhere about dowels. So I put dowels in the cake and stacked my layers with no plates or cardboard. Well you can guess what it did. It collapsed. Over the next few months I did some fundraiser cakes, cupcake creations, and a few birthday cakes. All the practice def paid off. I made my first wedding cake and I was amazed that I actually did it! So whats the big deal? Shouldn't I be happy that I'm learning so much in such a short time? Well I am grateful for the knowledge but now I've been getting orders from so many people that I don't know. It takes me so long to do a cake with my kids around. Right now I'm working on a baby shower cake. It is costing me more to make THIS cake than I am getting out of it. Getting motivated to start is the hardest part. I agonize and hold off as long as possible before getting down to business. Yesterday I baked the cake and while it was cooling Kimi climbed up and destroyed it. Money down the drain. So I had to go buy more supplies and bake another cake. Then today after I got it covered in fondant Takara decided to poke her fingers through it while I was busy printing out the design I wanted to use. Fondant costs $20.00 a box so as you can imagine I was not happy. In fact, I freaked. I felt pretty guilty for how bad I layed into Taraka. I was already having a bad morning (stomach issues and all) so this was the straw that broke the camels back. Thank goodness its Friday.